Sunday, February 26, 2006
im feeling damn pissed off now! i simply dun get it. maybe its just me.
the thing about poly is that its too big. u dun get much chances of excelling no matter how good/bad u r..and derez some damn thing known as peer evaluation. ur gd frend may appear SO nice to u but behind u, she/he can jus kill u silently.
The worst thing is, its not that u din do ur part of e job! u MUST be the leader! if not, e part of job given to u, u complete it, u still din do much! its like my BCA..my BMGT...well, i finished wad was given to me! i swear i did...n i finished them ON time. i tried to do my best..it may not be my fullest effort but i did it properly.. but still, i noe im being marked dwn..mayb not tt badly..but its still not fair! who can i complain to? well, ttz other ppl judgement..dey think u din do much n its your fault! and if u offer to do more, u din do it well enuff, the leader redo it, its your fault too! it means u do it last min...u ANYHOW do..mayb some ppl..dey r jus not gd at certain stuff..n if e output dun turn out well, it simply means u anihow do it...sometimes, just grab those typing in info job or those collaborating jobs..or mayb edit e whole thing..it will appear tt u did a lot..
its like...comparing myself n e person who did e least. the marks. its damn fucking pissed off one la! do i deserve this? i tried taking initiative. i bothered. i asked. and wad do i get in the end?
and this most recent thing tt jus happened. ohh chua jiesi! its a crime to live far! u dun deserve anithing or much lesser becuz u live in bedok! its YOUR fault for living far awae! thankiewww la...blame me. mayb it was wrong choice to choose so far awae..cant blame others but myself..not hving a mind of my own..got psychoed dere thanks to someone who changed so much! im jus dumb! n i din make trips dwn to tt fucking room to stay dere for hrs n its my fault. its not tt i din bother to stay back. i even went all e way dwn to collect a blazer n to stay for some "meeting" for few hrs n my frends had to wait for me. but still, its my fault! its my fault for not being more involved. i shld be e one contacting tchers n sending emails n tt will show tt u did more.. jus stay back n do nth it will reflect better on u too! i did my part..i did my profiling..i did e acknowledgements..n its still my wrong. u dunno wad others do behind ur back...u start to doubt..n dere goes e trust..its a 2 agst 1...i dunno wad e fuck is gg on..thankiew! u all may hv more leadership traits..no lor! i wun call it so..leaders will distribute job evenly n dey will care abt their members n not like this..so its MY fault for being more quiet.
its realli a mistake...n i cant run awae now. FUCK.
the thing about poly is that its too big. u dun get much chances of excelling no matter how good/bad u r..and derez some damn thing known as peer evaluation. ur gd frend may appear SO nice to u but behind u, she/he can jus kill u silently.
The worst thing is, its not that u din do ur part of e job! u MUST be the leader! if not, e part of job given to u, u complete it, u still din do much! its like my BCA..my BMGT...well, i finished wad was given to me! i swear i did...n i finished them ON time. i tried to do my best..it may not be my fullest effort but i did it properly.. but still, i noe im being marked dwn..mayb not tt badly..but its still not fair! who can i complain to? well, ttz other ppl judgement..dey think u din do much n its your fault! and if u offer to do more, u din do it well enuff, the leader redo it, its your fault too! it means u do it last min...u ANYHOW do..mayb some ppl..dey r jus not gd at certain stuff..n if e output dun turn out well, it simply means u anihow do it...sometimes, just grab those typing in info job or those collaborating jobs..or mayb edit e whole thing..it will appear tt u did a lot..
its like...comparing myself n e person who did e least. the marks. its damn fucking pissed off one la! do i deserve this? i tried taking initiative. i bothered. i asked. and wad do i get in the end?
and this most recent thing tt jus happened. ohh chua jiesi! its a crime to live far! u dun deserve anithing or much lesser becuz u live in bedok! its YOUR fault for living far awae! thankiewww la...blame me. mayb it was wrong choice to choose so far awae..cant blame others but myself..not hving a mind of my own..got psychoed dere thanks to someone who changed so much! im jus dumb! n i din make trips dwn to tt fucking room to stay dere for hrs n its my fault. its not tt i din bother to stay back. i even went all e way dwn to collect a blazer n to stay for some "meeting" for few hrs n my frends had to wait for me. but still, its my fault! its my fault for not being more involved. i shld be e one contacting tchers n sending emails n tt will show tt u did more.. jus stay back n do nth it will reflect better on u too! i did my part..i did my profiling..i did e acknowledgements..n its still my wrong. u dunno wad others do behind ur back...u start to doubt..n dere goes e trust..its a 2 agst 1...i dunno wad e fuck is gg on..thankiew! u all may hv more leadership traits..no lor! i wun call it so..leaders will distribute job evenly n dey will care abt their members n not like this..so its MY fault for being more quiet.
its realli a mistake...n i cant run awae now. FUCK.
Precious you
6:50 PM |